Negotiating with Clients
Safety At Work
What do I have to do with a client?
Nothing you’re not comfortable with. It
should always be your own decision to
offer or withhold services. You should feel
able to refuse a client or a particular sex
act at any time. You should never feel
obliged to have unsafe sex or to use
alcohol or drugs with a client. Just
because he’s paying you doesn’t mean he
can do anything he wants.
How do I deal with a client who
wants me to do something I don’t
want to do?
Some clients may complain if you suggest
oral with a condom; others may press for
you to provide bareback sex. What are
you going to say to combat that? If they
nag you, are you going to cave in or
stand your ground? Always keep in mind
what you are comfortable with. Are you
genuinely willing to make an exception? If
you say no and later say yes, will he think
he can get away with other things too?
Circumstances may vary, but whatever
course of action you decide to take, make
sure he knows you’re in control.
Just because he’s paying you doesn’t
mean he gets to cross your boundaries. Be
confident and assertive. Prepare yourself
for some of the more common reasons
men give for not wanting to use condoms.
Here are some suggestions of things you
might hear, and responses you could give.
See if you feel comfortable using these, or
modify them to better suit you.
Negotiating With Clients
Him: I’m clean, you don’t need to use a
condom with me.
You: This is for your safety and mine.
Him: Don’t you trust me?
You: Trust isn’t the point, people can
have infections without realising it.
Him: It doesn’t feel as good with a
You: I’ll feel more relaxed if we use one,
and if I’m relaxed then we’ll both enjoy
Him: I’m allergic to latex.
You: That’s not a problem, I have non-
Him: I don’t stay hard when I use a
You: I’ll help you put it on – then you’ll
Him: It just isn’t as sensitive with a
You: Maybe that way you’ll last even
longer and that will make up for it.
Him: Putting it on interrupts everything.
You: Not if I put it on for you...
Him: I’ll pull out before I come.
You: Pre-cum can carry infections too.
Him: Just this once!
You: Once is all it takes – and I have a
professional reputation to think about.
Fresco from the Casa del Centenario in Pompeii
No one is really sure if the erotic paintings on the
walls of Pompeian brothels were to illustrate the
services available or merely to excite the clients.
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